Monthly Archives: April 2011

After Period: One Space or Two?

MOLLY SCHOEMANN: I don’t recall exactly who it was that first told me that it was a good idea to put two spaces between each sentence when typing, but I’m going to say that it was probably an evil ex-boyfriend, for the sake of convenience. Continue reading

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In Briefs: Dangerous Pillow Fights

MOLLY SCHOEMANN: How did I miss National Pillowfight Day AGAIN?!?
http://www.wral.com/news/strange/story/9376955/ Also, I never liked
pillow fights. I always ended up getting hurt. Yes, I was THAT kid.

MATTHEW DAVID BROZIK: Until last year, I’d broken only one bone, my left pinky, and it had been in a pillow fight, when I was 12, at CTY for 3 weeks at Franklin & Marshall College, on the last day of the program, not an hour before my parents were going to meet me for the closing ceremony. Continue reading

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George Allen

HOWARD MEGDAL: George Allen’s difficulties not saying things that are taken as racially insensitive remind me of a story. When I was about eight years old, I really discovered college basketball. Come February and March, it was all I wanted to talk about.

CHRIS PUMMER: When I say last week’s kerfuffle probably didn’t sink Allen any lower, it’s because you have to consider the point from which he’d already fallen. Continue reading

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April Fools’ Day

MOLLY SCHOEMANN: I love April! It’s my birth month, and it’s cold and rainy, and it’s not quite spring yet because it’s still really cold and…basically, it’s my birth month. Yay, April.
But I’m not a huge fan of April Fool’s Day, or as it’s come to be known in recent years, “Day for Corporations to Send Out Phony Press Releases About Gag Initiatives They’re Launching, to Show How Hip and With-it They Are But Really it’s Just Annoying.” Continue reading

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SNL Helen Mirren/Foo Fighters

COLD OPEN
ZOË RICE: A bit blah from Armisenbama.

HOWARD MEGDAL: I don’t remember the last time this worked even moderately well. Yet they keep returning to both a mediocre format and Armisen’s mediocre Obama.

MONOLOGUE
ZOË RICE:

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JaMarcus Russell

KRYSTEN OLIPHANT: If we’re discussing the biggest No. 1 pick busts in the NFL, surely JaMarcus Russell has to be at or near the very top of the list. The guy has a rocket of an arm, the size of a horse and what looked like all the makings of the next big power quarterback.

And yet, he fizzled quicker than a sparkler on a wet Fourth of July.

CHRIS PUMMER: Russell is the cautionary tale that gets retold every few years. Sure, the name changes. Sometimes villain goes by the name “Joey Harrington” or “Akili Smith.” Sometimes the character isn’t so much the villain as much as an innocent talent demonized for the failings of his handlers. Then you could call him “David Carr.” Continue reading

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Redistricting

JESSICA BADER: Most odd-numbered years don’t offer that much excitement for those keenly interested in American electoral politics. Sure, a handful of states have their gubernatorial and/or legislative elections, and there are always the special elections and local races to focus on, but most of the action is in the even-numbered years. When that odd number is a “1,” however, there’s something every political junkie should look forward to: the redistricting process and the strategizing and score-settling and prioritizing that go along with it.

CHRIS PUMMER: Even when one party rules when redistricting comes around, it’s not always easy to pinch your political opponent. Continue reading

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Grease Revival

AKIE BERMISS: There are some parts of the American artistic institution that you really just shouldn’t touch. Something were done right the first time and they need no further tweaking. I think it is a position usually reserved for a sort of middle ground. Before something as become an antiquated text or historical document — when its just a classic. For me, when something gets old enough (and if it was great to begin with) then, in the right hands, it can start to thrive under re-interpretation.

JESSICA BADER: This near-mythical original Grease seems like a far more interesting show than the worldwide blockbuster we know and love. I’m thrilled that there will be a production of it in Chicago, and I’m hoping that it eventually makes its way to New York. Continue reading

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In Briefs: Sub Shop Comparison

MOLLY SCHOEMANN: Can we talk about sub shops? I am Firehouse all the way.

The first time I had a Firehouse sub, I got really angry. Why?

Because I was 29, and it was the first time I’d ever eaten a Firehouse sub. I could have been eating them for years, and I hadn’t been.

This enraged me.

It also made me really want a cigarette afterward. And I don’t smoke.

You can talk about how Jimmy Johns has better bread, but I won’t respect you.

CHRIS PUMMER: I have never been to Firehouse subs. But I can speak with authority that Jimmy John’s is vastly overrated. It strikes me as pretty blah. And if I want a blah sandwich, I’ll go Subway and get exactly the blah I want.
Continue reading

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SNL: Elton John

ZOË RICE: Unfortunately however funny this Kristen Wiig character is, we’ve just seen her too many times for the sketch to feel at all fresh anymore. But in contrast to the cold open a few weeks ago with Miley Cyrus, here’s the type of host you allow in the opening act. As in: major decades-consistent hit maker. Not Miley Cyrus.

HOWARD MEGDAL: This character isn’t nearly funny enough to justify the pointless Lawrence Welk reference. Continue reading

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